15 Tips and Tricks for your child's behavior.

15 Tips and Tricks for your child's behavior.

1.    Children do as you do.

Your child imitates and observes you as an idol to follow and behave in this world. Since you are that idol you need to act upon it and use your behavior to guide her. If you want your child to say or do something, then you need to do it first. An example of that is the word please. Also, if you want your child to grow up polite and talks in a low normal voice then you should also speak quietly and gently.
 

2.       Show your child how you feel.

Try being honest with your child by telling him/her how his behavior affects you. This will help see their feelings in you just like a mirror, it’s a way of empathizing. So you might say, ‘I’m getting upset because there is so much noise I can’t talk on the phone’. When you start the sentence with ‘I’, it gives your child the chance to see things from your perspective.
 

3.       Catch her being ‘good’. 

When your child behaves in a good way and the way you want them to you should always give her good comments and feedback to encourage her on doing good things. An example of that would be, ‘Wow, you are playing so nicely. I really like the way you are keeping all the blocks on the table’, instead of waiting for the blocks to come crashing to the floor and you start shouting,” Hey, stop that’’. Try to say six positive comments (praise and encouragement) for every negative comment (criticisms and reprimands). In conclusion, if a child has a choice between no attention or negative attention, they will always seek for it even it was a negative one. 
 

4.       Get down to your child’s level. 

Kneeling down to your child’s height level is an important tool that every mother should do, it eases the communication between you and your child. Getting close allows you to tune in to what they might be feeling or thinking. It also helps them focus on what you are saying or asking for.

5.    ‘I hear you.’ 

Always give a lending ear for your child, it helps them in co-ping with their feelings and emotions. Doing unlike can lead to a frustrated child because they feel you are keeping them from expressing themselves. When you "repeat back to them what you think they might be feeling", it helps to relieve some of their tension. Furthermore, makes them feel that you respect them and this will comfort them.
 

6.       Keep promises. 

Never break a promise to your child, they wouldn’t believe you anymore if you do so. Stick to your agreements and promises. This will build trust and respect between you and your child, regardless if they were good or bad. So when you promise to go for a walk after she picks up her toys, make sure you have your walking shoes handy. 

 

7.    Reduce temptation. 

Your glasses look like so much fun to play with – it’s hard for children to remember not to touch.  Reduce the chance for innocent but costly exploration by keeping that stuff out of sight.  
 

8.       Choose your battles. 

Before you get involved in anything your child is doing – specially to say ‘no’ or ‘stop’ – ask yourself if it really matters. By keeping instructions, requests and negative feedback to a minimum, you create less opportunity for conflict and bad feelings. Rules are important, but use them only when it’s really important.
 

9.    Whining: be strong.

 Kids don’t want to be annoying. By giving in when they’re whinging for something, we train them to do it more – even if we don’t mean to. ‘No’ means ‘no’, not maybe, so don’t say it unless you mean it. If you say ‘no’ and then give in, children will be whine even more the next time, hoping to get lucky again.
  

10.  Keep it simple and positive.

Simplify wording when  giving  instructions, your child will know what is expected of him. (‘Please hold my hand when we cross the road.’) Stating things in a positive way gets their heads thinking in the right direction. 

11.   Responsibility and consequences. 

As children get older, you can give them more responsibility for their own behavior. You can also give them the chance to experience the normal consequence of that behavior. You don’t have to be the bad guy all the time. For example, if your child forgot to put her lunch box in her bag, she will go hungry at lunch time. It is her hunger and her consequence. It won’t hurt her to go hungry just that one time. At  times you need to provide consequences for unacceptable or dangerous behavior.

12.  Say it once and move on.

 It is surprising how much your child is listening even though he might not have the social maturity to tell you. Nagging and criticizing is boring for you and doesn’t work. Your child will just end up tuning you out and wonder why you get more upset. If you want to give him one last chance to cooperate, remind him of the consequences for not cooperating. Then start counting to three.

 

13.  Make your child feel important. 

 Start introducing some simple house chores in helping the household. This will make him/her feel important and will take pride in helping out. Of course you should give them safe chores, these chores help children feel responsible, build their self-esteem and help you out too.
 

14.  Prepare for challenging situations. 

There are times when looking after your child and doing things you need to do will be tricky. If you think about these challenging situations in advance, you can plan around your child’s needs. Give him a five-minute warning before you need him to change activities. Talk to him about why you need his cooperation. Then he is prepared for what you expect.
  

15.  Maintain a sense of humor.

 Another way of diffusing tension and possible conflict is to use humor and fun. You can pretend to become the menacing tickle monster or make animal noises. But humor at your child’s expense won't help. Young children are easily hurt by parental ‘teasing’. Humor that has you both laughing is great.